Confession 1
The Salt Pills.
As Sophie would say, “Picture it...”
It's 1961. I'm 10 and a bad boy. I've taken up smoking along with a few of my friends on Dayton Ave.
(I won't name the others, they know who they are - this is a confession, not a tattle). It started when we got caught by Pops riding our bikes through the foundry on Main Street. Our punishment was 30 minutes of lecturing while he held our bikes hostage.
But, I’ve already told the smoking story.
This story is about the salt tablet dispenser in the entrance hall of the foundry.
We didn’t know that if you ate too many of them you would pee blood.
We found that out the day that we convinced one of our own that they were free salt candy.
Oh, and they tasted best if you ate them by the handful.
Sorry, [name redacted]. Glad you recovered. But you had the coolest colored pee on the whole block for about a week.
Confession 2
More on That Smoking Thing
The Dayton Avenue Gang thought I had the perfect hiding place for our smokes and matches.
We thought.
The forced hot air furnace in our house had a fresh air duct under my bed, with a ledge, and covered by a huge and heavy decorative grate.
Under my bed. Who would ever think to look there?
Who?
Why, Grandma Hedglin, of course!
She came from Clarks Summit one day to help Mom with spring cleaning.
They actually dismantled my bed.
They actually pulled up the grate.
They actually took me by surprise when I got home.
So, I used the only story I could come up with.
"They aren't mine. I'm holding them for a friend."
I know. So cliché.
Hey, it's been over 50 years. There must be a statute of limitations, right?
So, when they asked me who they belonged to (answer or be grounded for life), I threw the other bad boy on Dayton Ave under the bus.
Sorry, [another name redacted], but I really did hate the idea of being grounded. Please forgive me.
That was probably the only time my Mom ever called his Mom. No, wait, there was that [incident redacted] time, too.
Still to Come
"The Tough Girls of Hallstead" (or "The Girls That Broke My Heart" or vice-versa - Not!), "The Art of Dodging Trains and Flattening Pennies" and "Why You Should Never Tie Two Cat's Tails Together" (ok, that's a tattle, not a confession, and better left untold, I guess).